I Don’t Know Who I Am Anymore

To listen/watch this post: I switch on the espresso machine and lean back against the counter as I wait for it to warm. I hear its morning hum and my mouth salivates as the minutes seem longer than usual. My daughter, here for a visit, sits at the breakfast counter; quiet. Our weeks and months … Continue reading I Don’t Know Who I Am Anymore

The Leafless Tree

Her hands wrenching against her still swollen-- yet now lifeless belly. Mine equally wrenching against mine, where once I had nurtured her to life and held her and cradled her and dreamed all her same dreams. Dreams that had been dashed by a heart that stopped too soon. Her hands barren of ornament, mine dotted … Continue reading The Leafless Tree

Half a Piece of Pecan Pie, Please

Calf length fur coat, oversized costume jewels and thick black curls that framed an aging beauty-- her disposition was nothing short of graceful and her words feathery soft, but it was her smile that drew me in. It was a crooked smile lined with bright red lipstick that held a sadness that a bystander might … Continue reading Half a Piece of Pecan Pie, Please

Dear Baby I Aborted

Dear Baby I Aborted, Today is the twenty-third anniversary of the day I aborted you. That decision wrecked my spirit. Going to counseling shortly afterward, I was encouraged to name you and grieve you properly. I named you Alyshia, which means Truth. The truth is I didn’t consider you The truth is I didn’t see … Continue reading Dear Baby I Aborted

Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 3

This is the final installment of "Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter". This series of letters has been written as a communication tool only as a way to discuss the often difficult topic of dating  with our children, our expectations as parents, in addition to what we hope and pray they look for and be in a … Continue reading Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 3

Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 2

Last week, I began a short dating series titled "Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter". These letters will serve solely as a communication tool for my girls. In no way would I ever consider actually sending these letters. I'm pretty sure any boy interested in our girls would run for the hills! I decided to write this series because … Continue reading Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 2

Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 1

Preface From the time I was a little girl, I knew I was meant to be a mother. My greatest fear, other than the dark, at nine years old, was that I would die before I would marry and have children. I made my list of “must-have qualities”  for my future spouse and hoped and … Continue reading Dear Boy Dating Our Daughter 1